bunny-bo:

ghost-anus:

have you ever met someone on the internet that you liked so much that you sometimes sit there and think “oh man there are people who are lucky enough to see this person IN THE FLESH ON A REGULAR BASIS and I wonder if they realize how LUCKY they are”

Do you ever wonder if people think that about you?

queerqueensansa:

postllimit:

mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something

my dad has literally called me by his own name. 

dropped my MONSTER CONDOM for my MAGNUM DONG

(Source: virusexe)

grandpacain:

macklemorethanlikely:

i don’t understand why some people want the power to freeze things or fly or be invisible

dude imagine if you could stop time

like you could literally just stop time for a year and just do nothing or write a book

or you could stop time at night and literally have a full night’s worth of sleep in less than a second

you’d have so much time to do whatever you want

wow, i could get even more procrastinating done!

dabe-strudel:

what really sucks is when you know you should be doing something but physically cannot bring yourself to do it no matter how important doing that thing is

jaclcfrost:

the idea of getting flowers is so nice like. i would love flowers. i would love just a flower. you could give me just a fucking petal from a flower and i’d be happy damn

thug-4-life:

howstufftwerks:

crrocs:

being caught taking selfies is one of lifes most embarrassing moments. 

image

omg her peace sign lowering in shame


mentallyfuckingonedirection:

This says a lot about people

ahahahahahhaha the one where the woman looks at her shrugs then falls alseep too ahahahha

(Source: museumuesum)

THE FIRST TEN LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL

1. We are here to help you.
2. You will have time to get to your class before the bell rings.
3. The dress code will be enforced.
4. No smoking is allowed on school grounds.
5. Our football team will win the championship this year.
6. We expect more of you here.
7. Guidance counselors are always available to listen.
8. Your schedule was created with you in mind.
9. Your locker combination is private.
10. These will be the years you look back on fondly.

TEN MORE LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL

1. You will use algebra in your adult lives.
2. Driving to school is a privilege that can be taken away.
3. Students must stay on campus during lunch.
4. The new text books will arrive any day now.
5. Colleges care more about you than your SAT scores.
6. We are enforcing the dress code.
7. We will figure out how to turn off the heat soon.
8. Our bus drivers are highly trained professionals.
9. There is nothing wrong with summer school.
10. We want to hear what you have to say.


Laurie Halse AndersonSpeak (via feellng)